Another milestone, sort of

I've just finished the first draft (note: finished is the important word here) of my first post-Clarion story. Oh, I haven't been entirely idle: I've been revising and sending out stuff pretty consistently, and I'm simultaneously working on three large projects and a handful of smaller ones. But this is the first time since Clarion I've saved a file and thought, There, that's done.

Part of the problem is, I've been constantly second-guessing myself, as in many ways Clarion shook my hubris quite brutally. So many of the crits came as such a surprise to me that I became, at least for a time, convinced that I was incapable of telling good work from bad (specifically, telling my good work from bad). I just have to keep saying to myself, It may be crap, but it's MY crap, and I LIKE IT. And, of course, at the moment I'm writing it, I do like it. I feel very strongly that my writing must always, always be the best of what's in me.

I guess time will tell if other people like it too. I wouldn't mind an acceptance from someone about now. (I wouldn't mind it if it were as easy as wishing....)